Sometimes the edge just needs to come off! Really, really! What can do that better than a margarita? I don't know, probably something, but since that's what I had at my disposal, the following are my ramblings from the other side of a margarita and a half.
First of all, you notice that all the voices in the restaurant sort of become "wah, wah, wah-wah, wah, wah, waaaaahhhhh". It's kind of a nice feeling. You don't really hear all the stuff going on and it's like falling asleep on the way home from a long trip. You're aware but not really.
Normally, I can become a fairly good entertainer if I've had a margarita or two. But tonight, I'm done. I'm cooked. I'm toast. I'm blurry and need 14 hours of straight sleep. I'm kind of annoying my SELF! What good am I if I'm catatonic for the next half a day? Probably only good to myself. But who am I kidding? If I were to sleep for 14 straight hours somebody better watch out because either Hell froze over or the world might be about to end. Well, that was sort of predicted or there was chatter or something, but that's really just rude of me to say. So I will digress. On purpose.
Another thought is that CLEARLY all margaritas are not the same. For example, tonight I had one and a half. And you see what that has done to me. I'm a sleepy and rambling nonsense. Sometimes I can have several, I mean more than 2 but less than 13, and I'm good to go. Tipsy perhaps, but that's ok if you need somebody to entertain you. Maybe sing off key or something... And sometimes, I have this theory that if somebody mixes up the tequilas on you, it causes disastrouse results. For example, one particular night in Florida last year when I swear I drank less than 3 small plastic cups of margarita on the rocks. I think if you added it all up it might have been very much like tonight, 1 1/2, because see, I never actually finished any one of them. HowEVER, and this is second only to my martyrdom in Italy all those years ago, the ending of that oh so fun night in Florida ended with me in my hotel bathtub. That doesn't sound so bad to you? Well, I NEVER touch my bare skin, any part of it, to a hotel bathtub. But I did THAT night! Thank God for my Hawaiian buddy for saving me from I don't know what that night. I can't remember the last time someone other than my self dressed...ummm, my SELF! Happened that night though, what a freakin' mess! All that's just a theory though, maybe my tequilas weren't mixed. Maybe I was drunk on the Black Crowes? I pretty highly doubt it, but whatever. I was a night and following morning to forget. Yet somehow I have not.
I suspect tonight will not be one for the record books. I will post this post and fall asleep and that will be the end of it. I'm pretty disappointed in myself for my game having sunk so low though. I should be good for a laugh or two at this point and quite frankly, I'm not. I'm pissed off, sleepy and I'll probably wake up at 11 p.m. ready to start the day. Although, the day won't be ready for me to start it! I was thinking on the drive home that it would be nice to take a walk in the pitch black at 1 a.m. or so if you didn't have to be worried about being raped or murdered. Those two things would put quite a damper on an otherwise pleasant excursion. Geez, can't a girl even go for a middle of the night walk after sleeping off a margarita and a half and not have to get raped or murderded?! What is wrong here?!
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